I often times wonder...

About bloggers. I read several blogs where I have not actually "met" the bloggers. I wonder about them. I wonder what they believe in. I wonder how they will vote this election. I wonder how they feel about world peace, recycling, spanking, and Jesus. I love getting a glimpse into peoples lives. I'm curious about people. So I was thinking today, "I wonder what people think they know about me. I wonder how they percieve me from just reading my blog, or walking by me and saying 'hi' in church." I recently met someone whom I did not know, but who reads my blog and probably knows a lot about me. I wonder if I was anything like she suspected? So I thought I'd share a few things about myself that others might "wonder" about me.

I love Jesus. I believe that I am here and will have eternal life because he came and died for us...for me. I have not always felt that way. I would have always told you I "believed in God", but I didn't know it the way I do now. I don't know how this all evolved, but it did. I am forever thankful that it did. I'm sure it had something to do with the fact that I 'wonder' so much. :)

I am reading the bible thru http://www.bibleinayear.org/. I am reading the NIV in chronological order. I have never read the bible. I've read verses, chapters and even books of the bible. But never the whole thing. I am loving it. I love to read. I am reading several books right now that I think say a lot about me..."Into the Wild", "Serve God, Save the Planet", "Sub-merge", "There is no Me Without You", "Left to Tell", "The Shack".

I believe the planet is a gift from God. We are supposed to take care of it. When we don't we are disrespecting Him and selfishly not considering our grandchildren. I believe that from the core of my being. I recycle, I bring my own bags to the store, I try to turn off lights when are not in the room, I teach my kids to turn the water off while brushing their teeth, I try to avoid bottled water. These are the things I DO. There are SO MANY other things I should do, but I don't. But slowly, my eyes are opening more to the importance of this belief. I believed in all those things BEFORE I truly believed in God, but now it has a whole new meaning.

I believe in peace. I wanted to join the peace corp when I was in high school. You may have even called me a bit of a hippy.

I am registered "Independent". But you can probably count on me voting democratic on most occasions. I can't stand politics. They don't make sense to me. I think everyone should be "independent". I think there are democrats whos beliefs align with republicans on some things and vice versa. I don't understand why we have to label ourselves.

I have a degree in elementary education. I have a reading endorsement. I love the smell of schools...of crayons and glue and paint. I love the SOUND of school...kids screaming and laughing on the playground. I'm scared of junior high kids and how mean they can be to eachother. I student taught in 2nd and 6th grade classrooms. I worked in an afterschool program and taught one summer on grossology.

I have never once considered homeschooling. I would be awful. It's never even popped up on my radar. I have full faith in our public school system and am an involved parent. They are learning things there that will prepare them for adult life and maybe a lot of this has to do with the fact that I spent 4 years training to be a teacher and worked in the school system.

I have never spanked my kids. I have wanted to, but restrained. I really don't feel there has ever been a time when it has been appropriate. I believe every child is different and require different disciplines. Mine have just never required spanking in my book. As my family has grown, I have learned that we can never judge someone elses parenting techniques until we walk a mile in their shoes.

I spent the summer after my Freshman year of college in Japan, working on a military base as a camp counselor and life guard. I climbed Mt. Fuji and watched the sunrise from the top. Amazing.

I gave birth to a child born with a congenital cataract. She had the lens removed from her eye at 8 days old. She had 6 surgeries in 11 months. I had to patch her good eye and put a hard contact in her bad eye each morning and remove it each night. Her retina became detached during one of the surgeries and she is currently blind in that eye. And she will never see out of that eye because this all happended at such an early age and the neurons never developed in her brain. For the first day of her life we were told that something was "blocking" her red reflex in her left eye and it could be a tumor. It was a scary time. But now I never even think about it. After people get to know us they sometimes ask about her eye and it always catches me off guard. I don't dislike talking about it, I just don't notice it anymore and don't think about it.

I want more kids someday. I would love to adopt. More than anything, I pray that every single child in this world would get to experience love from a parent. I think about orphans and babies without parents EVERY SINGLE DAY. I remember in high school seeing a mother with a foster child and thinking how amazing she was. It stuck. I always thought I would foster or adopt or be a part, in some way, of the life of a child who has never known a mommy or daddy.

I had a miscarriage in January of 2003, just one month before getting pregnant with Nalani. It was so very sad and I rarely talk about it unless someone else discusses having a miscarriage. I don't know why I don't talk about that either.

I laugh a lot. Sometimes inappropriately. But I think it's good medicine. So if I have ever offended you with my laughing, I apologize.

So there. There are some things I wonder about people. I feel like I am an open book, but as I type these things I wonder if I'm not. I bet many of you knew none of this about me. I bet some of you may have even wondered (or maybe not). Like I said, this is a piece of who I am. I don't feel my beliefs are suited for every family. I love getting a look into the lives of others who so obviously do things differently than myself. And find it funny how what I believe has changed over the years as I have grown and as my family has grown. Take it or leave it. Just thought maybe you wondered.